I normally delete spam messages outright, but this one caught my eye.

After the obligatory “Prolong your ssex. You have small peniiis? Add 3 inches in lenght!” come on and link to the website (which no, I did not click) came this two-liner footer that seemed to come from some sort of aphorism generator – with a little bit typo here and there. Here’s what it said:

“A sprat to catch a mackerel. Work is the curse of the drinking classes It never rains, but it pours. Lear from the past, Live for today Look for tomorrow, take a nap this afternoon Fogiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the foot that crushed it.”

I love it

And oh, the email began, right before the prolong your sex thing, with the salutation “Dear Member.” mwahahahahaha.

Yes, that was one junk mail I actually did not mind getting because it made me laugh in the middle of a crazy day. On some days, man, you just take what you can get.